Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Swimming with fishes - Part One The Introduction

As some of you know I have dabbled in online dating in the past.  I have been getting back into it and I thought it would be fun to drag...I mean take you along with me.  Now some of you may be thinking "how desperately sad of you Tracy"...and to this I say two things....first "DON'T JUDGE".....and second I say hear me out on this.  I know I am not going to find "the one" online...yeah I know Match.com is pushing the whole 1 in 5 thing but I don't believe it is going to happen for me...I also don't believe I am going to find "the one" laying in my bed drinking a martini either.  I do believe that life is made up of interconnections and that fate plays a big part in meeting "the one" so it is entirely possible that an interaction began online can lead to something else.  And even if it doesn't I am pretty sure that my adventures will lead to some great stories.  And isn't that what life is all about....great stories?

I want to take a moment right now to say I have met some really cool people on the dating sites.  One person in particular has been a great friend for a very long time! So even if things don't work out for me romantically there is always the possibility that I will meet new friends.  And new friends are always cool!

My first foray into the dating sites was very different from my experiences today.  Back in 2003 when I first joined Match and Yahoo I was a broken soul.  My self-esteem was lower than low.  My husband had left me for another girl and I was feeling completely unattractive and unlovable.  So I was craving attention.  And I got attention! That person back then is nothing like the person today.  I spent hours online talking dirty, texting dirty, webcamming dirty....basically pimping myself out.  I dumbed down all my conversations...I was careful not to use any big words or literary references.  I said LOL a lot....even when it wasn't LOL-worthy.  I would meet anyone who wanted to meet me.  And unfortunately I would have sex with anyone who wanted to have sex with me...which was pretty much everyone who wanted to meet me....and I learned a valuable lesson.  Guys like to have sex (unlike Bill Clinton I am including getting their dick sucked here too) At the time my poor broken soul thought that if they wanted to have sex with me it must mean they liked me...it didn't.  Men are simple creatures...if they want to have sex with you it means that they want to have sex with you....girls should learn this at an early age.  It would save us all a lot of heartache. I got off the online crazy train for better or worse when I met my ex there.  That is another story for another day however.

This time around my online dating experience is ENTIRELY different.  For one thing I am no longer a broken soul.  I am not going to pretend to be someone I am not just so some poor dude on an online site will like me....I have enough people in my life that like me all ready...I don't really need that anymore.  Second I know that wanting to have sex with me is just that...I am also aware that a lot of people want to have sex with me.  I am not trying to sound conceited...it is what it is.  Most women have this power and don't realize it. And it can be very empowering once you do.  I have a pair of thongs that read "She who has the pussy rules the world" and it is kinda true. We have what the boys want.  And what we do with it is entirely up to us.  So this time around I am not interested in the hookups or one night stands because I know I can have that if I want.  With knowledge comes power! I have also realized that with age the filter that stops the thoughts in my head from coming out of my mouth is not as quick as it used to be.  So I am fast to call bullshit when I hear it.  Needless to say the guy who contacts me is not going to get the shy polite girl who wants everybody to like her anymore. 

So with this post I begin a series of me and my adventures online.  Hopefully you will find it funny.  For those girls who are also going through it too hopefully I can help you navigate the fishy waters.  And for you guys out there who are also online maybe I can help you out a little:) I am not trying to be mean or hurtful.  I am just telling things like they are...I don't tend to hold things back so it is possible that during this series there might be more information than some of you want to know....if so then don't read it.  My purpose is to entertain you.  So here we go....

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